5 Tips for Easing Separation Anxiety in Children

From the moment your child is born, they cling to you. They form an attachment to their primary caregiver because they rely and depend on them for their basic human needs and survival.

Since a child spends the majority of the first few years of their life being surrounded and cared for by their parents or primary caregiver, it can be common for them to develop separation anxiety if their parents try to leave them.

This can be seen with other family members, babysitters, or when children are dropped off at daycare or school. Even though separation anxiety is common, especially among young children, it doesn’t mean that it has to persist.

Here are 5 tips for easing separation anxiety in children.

1. Keep the Goodbyes Short

Saying goodbye to your child isn’t easy. Both parents and children can struggle with separating from one another. But delaying the goodbye can make it even more difficult. You’ve probably been in this situation before. You’re trying to drop your child off, but you’re unable to actually drop them off because you’re trying to calm them down, console them, and reassure them. You can help prevent this from happening by aiming to keep your goodbyes short, simple, and sweet. The longer you stick around, the more time the anxiety has to build.

2. Create and Stick to a Routine

Children thrive with schedules and routines. Try to work towards creating and sticking to a schedule so that you can work towards being more consistent with any future drop-offs. Once your child starts to see the pattern in the drop-off and pick-up, they’ll build more trust. Over time, your child will reduce their anxiety and fear of worrying that you won’t return because you’ll prove that you will always be there.

3. Be Specific About Your Return Time

Another way that you can instill confidence in your child that you’re going to be back for them is by being specific about when you’re going to pick them up. You may not be able to give them a specific time, but you can speak in their terms by referencing specific moments during their day.

For example, you can say that you’ll be back to pick them up after their nap time. If your trip is a little longer, instead of letting them know that you’re going to be gone for a certain number of days, try framing it with the number of nights or sleeps that you’ll be gone, so they have someone that they can count down or look forward to.

4. Practice Makes Perfect

You can’t expect your child to just be completely okay with you leaving them. While some children may not seem affected by their parents or primary caregiver leaving, a majority of children will deal with separation anxiety. With the right time and practice, you and your child will grow more accustomed to having to be a part of one another. Practice makes perfect after all. If you want to work with your child to ease the transition, try utilizing close family members, friends, or neighbors as practice. Let your loved ones help provide childcare or schedule playdates.

5. Seek Additional Support

It’s common for parents to want what’s best for their children. If you’re worried about your child’s separation anxiety, it’s important to know that you’re not alone. Many parents and children deal with this same thing every single day. That being said, if you believe that there’s a larger issue at play, you should trust your instincts. A licensed and trained child therapist can help work with you and your child on getting to the root cause of this anxiety and finding ways to overcome it. Reach out today to get started.